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Saturday, January 24, 2015

An Aunt and Nephew Ponder Coming Out

From Full Marriage Equality:
I have being in love with my nephew since I can remember. I am 39 years of age and he is 41. His dad and I are half brother and sister same dad different mom.
when we were teens my parents sent me to spent the summer at his house. That summer we fell in love. but we continue with our separate lives I got married so did he. over the years we kept in contact and saw each other when ever we could. He is my best friend my soulmate. we are still very much in love but we decided to never say or tell our families. they would never understand our bond.
my soul mate is also related to me in a similar way. one of his parents is my half sibling but we didnt grow up together, we fell in love as adults. we were in relationships where we were not happy so we left them and now we are the happiest we've ever been. though we do not tell our families, they can only speculate... there is no way to tell people, they would never understand. but we love each other so much we will go through anything.
I am an aunt that was born much later than my siblings, and I have a nephew close to my age. I'm 22 and my nephew is 20, and he's the son of my half-brother [which would make him her half-nephew, so he is actually as closely related at a 1st cousin].
My nephew and I have spent most of our lives together since we were toddlers, and we're best friends. As we were growing up, I started to develop feelings for him, but I was in denial. No one in our family has been in a similar situation, and I don't know anyone that's approving of this type of relationship. I was always in denial about my feelings and found excuses to explain it away until about a year ago, when I finally took some time to seriously think about it. And I realized, no matter how strange it is, I do in fact love him. And I can honestly say, looking back now, that even as young as between 10 to 13 years old, I had a childish crush on him, and in reality, I've always liked him a little.
But unlike all the other aunts and nephews in love on this page, despite the fact I've been sure of my feelings about a year now, I haven't even told my nephew about my feelings, and haven't told anyone else either. I'm afraid to tell him, and I'm sure that even if he had feelings for me, too, he would also be afraid.
This is the only site I have found that has had any support for an aunt/ nephew relationship, after digging through pages of search results. The only other results I can find are stupid things about aunts/ nephews seducing each other, or the occasional link to questions at the "ask yahoo" site.
The only other site I've been able to find that's about love relationships with family members is "Cousin Couples", which is a site for cousins that are in a relationship. I recently posted on there looking for someone to discuss this with. So far, only one person has replied to me. Though they were understanding, they said that despite us being close in age, aunts and nephews being together was different from cousins being together, and that basically, I should try to let go of my feelings for him, and not do anything unless my nephew makes it apparent that he has feelings for me first. Which again, I'm sure he'd be afraid, maybe more afraid than me.
I want to note that I do NOT want to have kids with him if only for how weird it would be for the child. I am NOT just some sex addict horn dog that would take anyone I could get. I do NOT just like him for some stupid reason, like what he looks like. He is my best friend, and I genuinely love him, and I love him for who he is. I love him more than I've ever loved another person.
I can't help it if the one person I love was born related to me. And I can't help that he couldn't at least be born as my cousin. And why is this any worse than cousins being together? Just because it's through my dad, then brother, instead of dad, then uncle. I can't say that it would work out, or if he even has feelings for me. But why should I have to be afraid to even take the chance?
I know this is a really weird situation, but it feels really messed up to me that I have to be afraid of even telling him my feelings.
There is absolutely nowhere to turn. I would really appreciate it if there was even one person that could be supportive, anybody, help!


  1. I'm in the same situation as you. Young, half sibling with him very close to my age. I'd never act on it as my family would be furious. It's not acceptable for aunts/nephews, uncles/nieces to become involved in our society. I'm trying to change my view of him, now I have another nephew from my younger brother and look on them both the same. It's hard though, but I just try and enjoy his company and be grateful when I can spend time with him.

    1. I'm sorry about that, but glad that you're still able to enjoy being a family with them. I'd just like to say, at least legally, there's a lot more variation regarding uncles/nieces and aunts/nephews. For example, it's legal in Canada. Even if it's not possible here, it might be possible somewhere else. Just food for thought.

  2. I am now in the same situation as the guy in it tell him.i would love to know how it worked out i am in love like never before she is 1 yr younger than me it is hard to fight