A Man From Kindred Spirits

A man involved for almost two decades with his mother recently posted about his story on Kindred Spirits. (If you decide to join, follow the rules. They're simple, but strictly enforced.) I've been exchanging messages with him, and he gave me permission to post his story.

One of the things I'd like to point out, going in, is how when society and the government force people into the closet, it doesn't necessarily change their behavior, but just makes them more secretive. The best that can be expected is that they're forced to live a lie in fake marriages. When those marriages fall apart, it hurts everyone involved. Forcing homosexuals to marry the opposite sex will just cause increased angst for all the heterosexuals unknowingly marrying them.

Similarly, when consanguinamorous people marry to meet social expectations or throw off suspicion, they frequently end up cheating on their spouses, and eventually divorcing. These kinds of sham marriages are probably not what "family values" "conservatives" have in mind when they're promoting "traditional marriage", but they're the inevitable result.

My mother and I have been in a sexual relationship going on 15 years now [...]. At the time my step father was dying of cancer, and my mother was in a very lonely, dark place.

It all began when my step father was diagnosed with stage 5 melanoma cancer. My siblings and I had all moved out of state years ago, and my mother was left with the burden of caring for my step father during the evenings, being [that] she was a nurse. During the day, Hospice took care of my step father while my mother worked a full time job as a nurse.

It started with a phone call every week to a couple of days, when he was initially diagnosed with cancer. Our conversations were pretty predictable at first as we would talk about my step father, and his treatments. My mother was doing her best to optimistic, but he was given a year to live at most so, she knew his time was limited.

As the months wore on, my mother's phone calls became more frequent, and our conversations began to shift to subjects such as her fears of losing my step father with no one around to comfort her, to dating, and eventually sex. It was a bit uncomfortable discussing the subject of sex with her, but with no one around to talk to, she confided in me how much she missed sex.

By the time September came around, my mother and I had become quite comfortable discussing things of a sexual nature. We both began to share things we both enjoyed about sex, and that is when I discovered my mother was a very sexually charged woman. It wasn't long before we were sharing intimate details about our sex lives.

When my step father's condition worsened in October, I booked a plane ticket to go home to visit for Thanksgiving for a week. For the first time in months, my mother's spirits were lifted at the news of my visit for the Holidays. It had been nearly four years since I had been home [...] to see my mother since moving out of state, and she was excited in a way that only a mother could be about seeing her son.
As soon as we met at the airport, and she embraced me in a long hug, followed by a quick kiss on the lips, I knew something was different. There was a type of... tension between us, a type of sexual tension as we left the airport with her arm in mine.

That night when we sat down to watch TV, and my step father was asleep in his room, my mother put on a small pink bath robe that revealed a fair amount of cleavage, and came halfway down her thighs. It had been years since I had seen so much of my mother's body, and I had to admit she looked good with a little weight in all the right places giving her a very supple figure.

When she sat down on the sectional couch across from me to watch TV, she lifted her feet up on the couch and, opened her legs giving me a unobstructed view of her... well you know. I was aroused the entire time we watched TV, and I was quite sure my mother took notice, but was nice enough not to say anything to me to prevent any embarrassment.

That night she wound up at my bedside in tears about being widowed, and how she missed sex. In a fit of sobbing, she asked me if I would have sex with her. I didn't feel pressured, or coerced by her proposal. I said yes, because I loved her dearly, and her well being was of concern to me. [...] We ended up having sex frequently for the remainder of my visit, and in that time she confessed she loved me as a son, but was in love with the man I had become.

I ended up moving home a week later, and for nearly five years we lived as a couple under the guise of a son living with his mother. It took an extraordinary set of circumstances to bring my mother and I together, and for the last 15 years I have been a son, a lover, a pseudo husband, and a friend to the love of my life, my mother.
Love you mom!

[...] During the first 6 months we were together, shortly after my step father's death my mother found out she was pregnant [...]. I won't lie and tell you we were overjoyed at the news initially. My mother was scared about anyone finding out I was the father, and she was concerned about the health of our child as well.

During her second month, my mother and I decided on a story to stick with about her having a one night stand, and discussed how it would be better if our child knew me as her brother. We talked often about what we were going to do in different scenarios, and we became less worried, and more excited about the life we had created from our love.

Just after three months, my mother ended up having a miscarriage. As relieved as we were about having a child, my mother and I had become used to the idea of having a child and we mourned our loss together. In the many months that followed, my mother seemed determined to conceive again, but the beginning stages of menopause prevented us from trying for a baby.

Although the pregnancy failed, it brought my mother and I closer together as a couple, and we continued on living as such for some years before we decided to live apart to avoid any suspicions. We are both married as of now, but over the years we have found ourselves drawn back to each other again.

As of [late], my mother's marriage is failing due to my step father's erectile dysfunction, and his increasingly mean behavior. Just two weeks ago, my mother informed me she was coming to town, and that she needed to talk to me. Turns out her and my step father are divorcing soon, and she wanted me to be the man in her life again.
We spent nearly all day in her room making love, and she admitted to me she wanted us to be together again. I admit I love my wife, but what my mother and I have is beyond your typical love.

[...] Some years ago my mother and I made the decision it was best we date other people to keep my youngest sister from suspecting something was going on between us. When we moved to a new state [over a decade] ago, and we were moving into a new home, my mother, my youngest sister, and I had to share an apartment for a short time.

We didn't have time to unpack our beds the day we moved into the apartment so we used two sleeping bags as beds our first night there. There was only two bedrooms, and my mother suggested my sister and I use the sleeping bag as a mattress, with sheets for covers. My sister objected to sharing bed space with me, so my mother suggested I share a sleeping bag with her that night instead. As you can imagine, my mother and I certainly didn't mind sharing a bed.

That night when we were certain my sister was asleep my mother and I decided if we were [quiet] we could get away with having sex. [...] [A]fter we finished there was a sudden knock at my mother's bedroom door. I never forget how we just froze with my mother still on top of me as we panicked to cover ourselves.

I quickly pulled the sheets over me and feigned sleeping, while my mother put on a t-shirt and told my sister, "Just a minute". My heart was pounding in my chest as my mother cracked her bedroom door and asked my sister what she wanted. [...] My mother spoke with my sister for a short time, and when she closed the door I could see the fear in her eyes.

We didn't get caught, but my sister sensed something was amiss for sure, because the next day she kept giving me and my mother weird looks. I asked her, when I got paranoid, what was the matter, but she never said [...] if she suspected something. About a year later after we had moved into her home we decided to see other people to shake my sister's suspicions.

Figured I'd share how things changed between my mother and I since we are both married now, but recently my mother and I met, and we have discussed being together again due to her marriage failing.

[...] I have considered talking to my sister to find out if she knows or even suspects what going on with Mom and [me], but my mother feels if she hasn't said anything by now, best let sleeping dogs lay.

When I think back on that night I know my mother and I did our very best to be quiet, but there [were] a few moments when the passion became pretty intense from the thrill we got from having sex with my sister in the house. It was a very risky thing to do, but after moving all day and with my sister around as often as she was, we just couldn't resist. [...]

As I told you recently with my mother's pending divorce, she has been traveling into town more often until she moves back in the fall. We have been meeting more often for our trysts lately and our need to be together is growing. The love and trust my mother and I have transcends any love I have felt for any other woman. I wish I could find the words to articulate how we feel for each other, but I don't know if a [word] exists to describe this kind of love. Perhaps that is why I have searched the Internet all these years now trying to find people who can understand what it is to share the kind of love we have all these years.

[...] What my mother and I do behind closed doors is no one's business and I believe the law has no right to come into my bedroom anymore than they do for homosexual couples.

[...] P.S. You are right, me being married does complicate things, but if my mother and I do decide to take the next step it will be the end of my marriage. If I had to choose between my wife and my mother the decision would go to my mother. Don't get me wrong, I do love my wife, and it would break her heart, but I don't know if my mother and I can go on denying the fact we were made for each other. I guess we'll see how things pan out over the coming months.

[...] Your right, it is a shame my mother and I have to live a lie to be together the way we want to for now. We love each other dearly and we put on Oscar award winning performances around family. I think the only thing that could give us away possibly is the way we look at each other sometimes; it feels like it's obvious we're in love, but it's just my own paranoia.

We're just not sure how my siblings would handle knowing [M]om and I have been ardent lovers for 16 years this coming December. My mother and I both agree that they wouldn't need to know about her losing the pregnancy all those years ago.

[...] I can't describe the excitement I feel inside when we kiss after months of not being together. The look in her eyes as we make love is beyond any words I can find to describe it. She is truly the love of my life. We know we could never be together the way we want, but we feel fortunate to have each other as often as we can.